Bend Parenting Examiner

Hi :) I'm Codi, a single parent of 4 beautiful children ranging in ages from 15 down to 3. I have a 15 year old daughter that I adopted when she was 12, my oldest son is 13 and is a special needs child (ADHD/PTSD/Impulse disorder), I have an 8 year old daughter that is just bursting with creativity :) and a 3 year old son who despight my best efforts refuses to wear clothing lol.

I am a photographer, a freelance writer and a web/graphic designer by trade and all the rest of the time I'm simply full of mischief :)
Nevaeh made a Buck :) (Taken with Instagram at home)

Nevaeh made a Buck :) (Taken with Instagram at home)

This guy’s on to something here lol!

This guy’s on to something here lol!

Tagged: funnyhilariouslol

Codi's Bend Parenting Examiner on →

parenting advice and articles on everything from pregnancy and divorce to temper tantrums and raising teenagers. I write my articles geared for your every day parent who may not always have all the answers. I do so with a bit of a humorous flair and sometimes add a dash of sarcasm just to spice things up and keep everyone smiling and on their toes wondering what random topic I will come up with next.

Tagged: Parentingadvicebabiesbabychildreninfanttoddlershumorsarcasmfunny

If at first you don’t succeed…do it the way your mother told you to!

Tagged: humormomsfunny

Interviewing babysitters:Know what questions to ask

As parents we only want the best for our children and that especially goes for the care they receive while we have to be away from them. It’s important to interview prospective babysitters and not just use someone because one of your friends used them a few times or a colleague from work recommended them. Every family is different and has different needs and expectations. What may be right for their children may not be right for yours.

The first thing you will need to decided is whether you’d prefer to have a younger babysitter or an adult caregiver for your children. After you’ve found a few candidates you’ll want to compile a list of questions you’d like to ask. Here are some of the more important things to inquire about when interviewing a prospective babysitter.

For a younger babysitter

  • Do you have a current First Aid Infant/Child CPR Certification?
  • Do you still babysit for any of your past clients?
  • What ages are you most comfortable with?
  • What are some of the games that you play with the children you babysit?
  • How do you discipline?
  • How do you handle emergency situations?
  • What do you think about babysitting with friends over?
  • What days/hours can you work?

For an adult caregiver

  • Are you First aid Infant/Child CPR Certified?
  • Do you have children of your own?
  • What ages do you relate the best with?
  • What types of activities do you do with the children you watch?
  • How do you discipline?
  • What are your career goals?
  • What situations are most difficult for you and how do you handle them?
  • What days/hours are you available?

Once you’ve interviewed the babysitter if you feel comfortable with the answers they’ve given and the overall feel of the interview you should bring the children to meet them and allow them to interact under your supervision for 10-15 minutes to see how the connect. Pay attention to how they react to each other, do the children seem comfortable with the babysitter? Is the babysitter engaging, and interacting with them or simply watching and responding to them?

By simply taking an afternoon or two and interviewing potential babysitters you can save yourself a great deal in the long run on several different levels. You’ll ultimately save time, money, and have happier, healthier, safer children.

How to find childcare in Bend:

Tagged: babysitterkidschildrenParentinginterviewinginterviewing babysitters


Toddlers and tantrums: How to handle them without losing it yourself

If you have a toddler, you know all about temper tantrums. Unless of course you are one of those lucky few that happen to have a toddler that does what you tell them and never throws a fit of any kind. It’s okay, the rest of the parentingcommunity has a term for that. It’s called ‘denial’. Seriously though, no child is perfect, and turning a blind eye to their misbehaving will only cause things to fester and get worse. No one wants that, which is why we are all here.

At some point every parent is going to be faced with the dreaded fire breathing dragon that is ‘The Temper Tantrum’. Now for a few it may be something that only happens a handful of times and once the child figures out that it doesn’t work, they stop the behavior. Not all of us are quite so lucky however. Most of us get a short phase of tantrums and then some of us are blessed with the strong willed children, who know exactly what they want and when they want it and have absolutely no qualms about letting you or anyone else know that they are not getting it right at that very instant and it doesn’t matter if you’re at home or in the middle of a wedding ceremony. A little pat on the back to these parents, it’s not easy raising a strong willed child, and there is nothing wrong with them. Being strong willed is actually quite a formidable personality trait to have and is not something you can learn. You are simply born with it.

So that being said, let’s move on to some of the things you as parents can do to lessen the eye-twitching, hair pulling, and teeth grinding days, and possibly the need for Tylenol and talk about positive things. Hopefully these will help you feel like stronger and more confident, in control parents and help your toddlers feel more centered and have a better grasp of simple boundaries.

When your toddler throws a tantrum at home:

It’s important to hold your ground and stay calm. Using a calm voice and reinforcing simple rules such as ‘I’m sorry you’re upset because you’re not getting what you want right now, but we don’t scream indoors’ is a good way to let them know that you understand why they are upset, but there are still rules to follow. If they don’t lower their voice, you can say something like ‘I can see that you’re still angry and that’s okay. If you want to scream, you can scream into a pillow in your room’. Make sure that you say this calmly but in a firm tone which lets them know that you’re not playing their game. If your first 2 requests have failed to yield any positive results then it is time to pick your child up and physically remove them from the situation. You don’t have to say anything while you’re doing it, simply set them down in their room and tell them that when they have decided to calm down and speak with an inside voice they are welcome to come out and rejoin the family.

When your toddler acts out or has a tantrum in public:

This one is actually much simpler to deal with. The first time your child misbehaves you kindly let them know in a calm voice that misbehaving will result in leaving the store, restaurant, park, or wherever it is that you have gone. You don’t have to actually go home, just simply remove them from the situation and stimulation. The majority of the time just going to the car and sitting for a few minutes is more than enough to calm them right down. However if it isn’t, don’t be afraid to follow through and take them home.

A few things to remember, only wait a minute or so in between telling your child that screaming (or whatever the tantrum behavior happens to be) is not acceptable and giving them a second warning and finally if needed removing them from the situation. When using a time out (putting them in their room, time-out chair, or wherever you choose), use 1 minute for every year of their age unless they are a special needs child (ADHD for example) then you should cut that time in half. When taking them out of time out always give them a short ‘pep talk’ to let them know that you love them, but that behavior is not acceptable or allowed.

Here are a few local toddler parenting links for your resources.

Tagged: Parentingtoddlersparenting toddlers & preschoolerstemper tantrum


Postpartum depression

Being a new mom can be a extremely taxing. It doesn’t take long to become drained of energy and feeling overwhelmed. Right after the you bring baby home, friends and family come by to visit, disturb schedules and bring gifts. But it quickly fades. Friends that don’t have kids have more entertaining things to do, and those that do have kids are usually busier than you and your single friends combined. The mother in law you were dreading in the first place, even eventually goes home. Then it’s just the two of you, and sadly baby isn’t the best conversationalist.

You find yourself crying all the time, the baby seems to never stop crying and OMG is there no end to this laundry? Sound familiar? Could be Postpartum Depression and don’t worry it doesn’t last forever.

Sometimes it’s called postnal depression and is a form of clinical depression. It affects approximately 25% of women shortly following childirth sometimes even through the first year. It carries with it many symptoms which you may have one of or any combination. If you find that you have any of the symptoms below please contact your doctor immediately. Postpartum Depression is easily managed with either counceling, medication or both. You may even find that talking to friends and family helps immensely.

Symptoms include but are not limited to:

  • Changes in eating/sleeping patterns
  • Sadness
  • Fatique
  • Reduced libido
  • Crying episodes
  • Anxiety
  • Irritability

Should you find that you have any of these symptoms here are some resources in Central Oregon to help:




Tagged: postpartum depression


Pregnancy: Physical changes part 3

In part two we covered many more of the physical changes that take place during pregnancy, here we conclude in part three…


pregnant woman’s blood volume can increase by as much as 40%? Needless to say, your circulatory system has to work harder & tends slow down a bit later in pregnancy. Which can lead to swelling. When you have a decrease in circulation, you want to avoid staying in the same position for too long. Your doctor will monitor & check the amount of swelling at each prenatal visit. A bit of swelling is normal & to be expected, however if you notice a great deal of swelling please contact your doctor promptly.


Hemorrhoids are not serious & unfortunately common among pregnant women. They are simply put, enlarged or varicose veins in the rectum. They may appear as small bulges at the rectal opening, or may be on the inside of the rectum, & not visible at all. Do not be alarmed if they bleed a little during a bowel movement, especially if you are constipated. There are medications to help with the symptoms & your doctor can tell you which brands are safe for pregnancy.


Braxton Hicks can begin as early as 20 weeks, & it can be difficult to tell the difference between ‘Braxton hicks’ & true labor. Braxton hicks are a ‘practice’ contraction. For the most part they are not painful & do not form a pattern like true labor contractions will. However any time you are uncertain, you should contact your doctor immediately.

Here are some links for maternity portraits here in Central Oregon:

Tagged: Pregnancypregnantpregnancy & motherhoodpregnancy & teens


Pregnancy: Physical changes part 2

In part one we covered some of the physical changes that take place during pregnancy, we continue on in part two…


One of the draw backs to Prenatal Vitamins is the Iron Supplement, which can lead to constipation. Also whilepregnant you have extra Progesterone & this tends to slow down the intestinal tract. If you find your bowels to be irregular you can try eating fiber-rich foods like fresh fruits & vegetables. If a fiber-rich diet is not quite enough to keep your bowels moving regularly your doctor can suggest a pregnancy safe stool softener for you.


Leg cramps typically occur during the second trimester due to the increased pressure of your growing uterus. Try avoiding sitting with your legs crossed for long periods of time for starters. Stretch the muscles in your legs by flexing your foot. Lastly, try to avoid lying on your back, the pressure of your uterus puts strain on your spine, decreasing the blood flow to your legs, causing them to cramp.


Dizziness is quite common during the first trimester. You can try to lessen occurrences by not skipping meals & eat regularly. Do what you can to not get over-heated; this can bring on dizziness quickly & even more so if you haven’t eaten. Most importantly, if you feel dizzy, sit down & rest, have a glass of water while you wait for it to pass.


As your uterus grows & pushes your organs further up into your ribcage it is not uncommon to experience times when you are short of breath. There are a couple of tricks you can use to ease your discomfort. Maintain good posture; hold your shoulders slightly back. You can also sleep with your head elevated; this will help a little too. If you feel short of breath raise your arms over your head, this will open up your diaphragm giving you a little extra room to breathe.


If you have heartburn at night, sleep with your head & torso elevated. This will help keep stomach acid from reaching the esophagus (throat), which is when you feel heartburn. You can help prevent the heartburn by eating small meals throughout the day & avoiding fatty, fried, & spicy foods. If you are unable to bear the severity of your heartburn I urge you to speak with your doctor about pregnancy safe acid reducing medicines.

Here are some links for maternity shopping here in Central Oregon:

Motherhood Maternity
Shops At Old Mill District
450 Sw Powerhouse Drive
Bend, OR 97702

Bend Factory Outlet Stores

61334 South Highway 97

Bend OR 97702

Angel Kisses Maternity

800 NW Wall Street
Suite 2
Bend, OR 97701


Tagged: Pregnancypregnantpregnancy & motherhoodpregnancy & teens


Pregnancy: Physical changes part I

There are so many different things going on in a woman’s body during pregnancy, you can expect both emotional & physical changes to occur from the very beginning of your pregnancy. On the physical end of things you can expect to experience a multitude of changes that you can learn more about here.


One of the first things you may notice is that your nipples & areolas have not only become incredibly sensitive, but they’ve gotten darker & larger in size. This is completely normal. Your nipples will reduce in size & darkness after pregnancy. During your pregnancy your breasts themselves will also grow in size & may become quite tender.


Later in your pregnancy you may notice a dark line going down the center of your belly. Don’t freak out, it’s ok, it’s called Linea Nigra, it’s not permanent & doesn’t happen to all women. You may notice it more if you have a naturally darker skin-tone or have skin that tans easily. The line begins to disappear shortly after birth.


Spider Veins are simply an enlarged vein close to the skin’s surface. This is due to the extra Estrogen & blood volume your body is carrying & usually goes away after pregnancy. Unless you have a very severe case they are not dangerous and will not require any attention.


This is due to your skin stretching to accommodate your growing baby. The easiest way to keep from itching is to frequently massage your skin with moisturizer. There are several great moisturizers on the market to use just for pregnancy. They usually have cute names like ‘belly butter’ or ‘bump butter’ & should be thick & take a couple of minutes to absorb into your skin.


Your body is growing, naturally…but when we grow too quickly or don’t have enough elasticity we end up with stretch marks. These are skin-tone discolorations, slightly indented jagged like lines. You can get them anywhere on the body. They tend to be a little tender & can be itchy…they may diminish in appearance with time, although they will never completely disappear.


During your first trimester hormonal changes within your body which cause an increased blood-flow to the mouth & sinus cavity in turn can cause bleeding gums & nosebleeds. Unfortunately there isn’t much you can do about this but it does tend to ease up as your pregnancy progresses.

Here are some links to pregnancy resources here in Central Oregon:

Tagged: Pregnancypregnantpregnancy & motherhoodpregnancy & teens